Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer (tv)
Characters: Ethan/Randall
Summary/Teaser: Ethan finds Giles isn't home.
Warnings: explicit sex between adult males
Spoilers: none. set pre-series.
Notes: Written for eatenbyweasels for trkkr47's Ethan ficathon.
Word Count: 837

Standard Disclaimer: Joss Whedon and co. own the characters, I'm just playing with them. I do, however, own this story, so don't steal it. Archive it anywhere; just ask first.

Feedback is always appreciated. Make me blush with praise or rip apart the story with criticism, or both.

Uninvited Houseguest
by Elizabeth Scripturient

"You're about as welcome as a snake in a lucky dip, Ethan."

"Oh, Randall. I'd be offended if I didn't know how much you liked," here he paused meaningfully, "snakes."

Randall pointedly ignored the comment and continued washing the dishes.

"So what are you doing here?" Ethan asked. "Ripper finally decide he needed a housemaid?"

"No, Ethan. He had to leave town for a few days, and he asked me to take care of his goldfish."

"Twenty-two years old and the man has a bloody goldfish?"

"Iím surprised you didn't know. You seem to spend rather a lot of time here."

"Well I'm not usually so bored as to look for small animals to entertain me."

"Yes, I'm sure Rupert is a perfectly fabulous conversationalist. Considering he actually likes you, whereas I merely tolerate you."

"Conversation?" Ethan snorted. "Surely you don't believe that's what we're doing."

"Of course not, Ethan. Iím no naive schoolgirl. I just don't exactly relish the imagery."

"Not your type, Randy? My ego will never recover."

"You don't care two figs what I think, Ethan, and everyone knows it."

"True. True. But here I am, with an entire afternoon free, and my plans impolitely dashed."

"Yes, I'm sure Rupert will be sure to insist that his family refrain from having emergencies save for when you are away on holiday."

Randall had finished drying the dishes and stood watching Ethan warily.

Ethan picked the goldfish up out of the tank and dangled it.

"You see, Ethan. This is why he didn't ask you to mind his fish."

"Oh I know that. I was just thinking that he should know better than to leave me here in London unattended. After all, there's so much trouble I could get into without him to pull me back." Ethan dropped the fish back in the tank and leaned his face in close to Randall's.

"Yes I'll be sure and tell him that when he returns."

"Are you planning on staying here until that return?" Ethan's breath was hot on Randallís face.

"Were you?"

Ethan leaned back. "Randy! Getting some spunk. I'm impressed."

"The last thing I'm interested in is impressing you." Randall seemed about to step backwards for a moment, but he stood his ground.

"Not interested in sharing Ripper's leftovers, are we? Or wait, perhaps truly it's Ripper we're after. I must admit, whoring oneself out as a housemaid, that takes commitment. Have you got a nice little French maid outfit for when he comes home?"

"Oh go to hell, Ethan."

"Of course I am. The real question is what I'm going to do until then."

"I hear the streets of London have a variety of sleaze and entertainment to offer."

"Was that an insult, Randall? For shame. Do you know what a chaos mage is, Randall? I'll have you know I am the sleaze and entertainment London has to offer."

"Well then go. Offer your services to the fine people of this city."

"Are you trying to get rid of me?"

"You don't take subtlety well, do you?"

"Subtlety is just so droll. And did you hear the chaos bit?"

"Of course I heard it. I just chose to ignore it."

"Chaos is a force to be reckoned with. You feign ignorance at your peril."

"Perhaps, but at the moment you are a right pain in my ass."

"No, but I could be."

And there was a light flutter as a Randall's clothes vanished.

"I'm not getting those back, am I?"

"Maybe if you're good."

Randall caught himself before the sentence "And what would that entail?" escaped his lips. He really hoped some sort of magic was responsible for the fact that he wasn't walking away right now to go borrow some clothes from Rupert's bedroom.

"Your wit disappeared with your clothes?"

Randall opened his mouth and then closed it again.

"Now don't go blaming this on me. I did not magic away your voice." And he proved it, by grabbing Randallís cock, eliciting a sharp cry.

"That's the spirit. Now tell me to stop." Ethan stroked Randall's cock between his thumb and forefinger. "Tell me I'm a bad, rude man." He was squeezing gently now.

"Oh god, please don't stop."

Ethan smiled and leaned in to kiss Randall. Randall kissed back, pushing his body against Ethan's as Ethan raked his fingernails gently up and down the length of his cock. Ethan could feel the other man's hunger, his desire, his need, and he relished the feeling of holding his hand firm on his cock as he pressed up against him, grabbed his shoulders, devouring his mouth, begging him wordlessly to let him come. He held him on the edge for some time, drinking in his need, and finally he jerked his hand just so, and Randall cried out and came, almost falling backwards. Ethan steadied him with one hand, his other hand still on his cock. Behind the shout he had heard a door opening, and he turned.

"Ripper. Didn't expect you back so soon."

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